Years before my spiritual world was rocked and I had my life changing experience that led me back to the fullness and beauty of the Catholic Church, I realized that I didn’t know or like who I was. So I began the journey inward to discover who I was and find reconciliation. What I didn’t realize was, that I was preparing my soil.
So, what type of soil are you? Are you rich soil, or maybe rocky ground. How about parched earth? Or are you just plain thorny?
Jesus spoke to them at length in parables, saying: "A sower went out to sow. And as he sowed, some seed fell on the path, and birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky ground, where it had little soil. It sprang up at once because the soil was not deep, and when the sun rose it was scorched, and it withered for lack of roots. Some seed fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up and choked it. But some seed fell on rich soil, and produced fruit, a hundred or sixty or thirtyfold. Whoever has ears ought to hear." Matthew 13: 1-9
When I look back, I kept my self-improvement and my search for the Truth separate. But I’m sure God knew exactly what he was doing with me as I blindly went through the popular self-help books, audio CD’s and videos at the time. Some helped in their own way so I don’t want to dismiss them all. Interestingly, most of them seemed to be christian lite. What I mean is, they had aspects of the bible but most of the guts, the parts that really matter, taken out and made very simplistic.
But never mind all that, I was busy digging deep into who and what I was all the while, totally oblivious to the fact that I was pulling out weeds, rocks and thorns. Preparing my soil for what was to become my spiritual awakening.
If you have not read my reversion story, which was recently published in Shalom Tidings Catholic magazine, I encourage you to do so. In it I share how the Holy Spirit entered my inner most being and shook me to the core in the most amazing way.
No matter where we are on our faith journey, it is imperative that we continue tilling our soil. Learning and growing in our spiritual life. In my ongoing deepening of my faith, I developed a prayer/exercise titled, “Opening Oneself to God.” Although it can be done anytime, I like to do it before Mass, to help me open and prepare myself for all our beautiful Catholic Mass has to offer.
So, what type of soil are you? Time to look within and find out. Jesus is patiently waiting to take root in you.
OPENING ONESELF TO GOD
Picture in your mind, a funnel. With eyes closed, imagine the small end of the funnel on top of your head, and the large end is going out into the unseen world. Then pray, Abba, Open my mind to know you. Then, move the funnel to your ears, small end on your ears, the large end out into the unseen world and pray, Abba, Open my ears to hear you. Move the funnel to your eyes. The small end of the funnel at the bridge of your nose, the large end out into the unseen world and pray, Abba, Open my eyes to see you. Now, in your mind, place the small end of the funnel over your heart, the large end out into the unseen world and pray, Abba, Open my heart to love you Allow yourself time at each point. No need to rush. “How can you draw close to God when you are far from your own self?” Augustine - AD 500. Confessions
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